Martin Luther King Day

We had school today, and we talked about Martin Luther King Jr.  I shared with the girls all that I remember of that period of time and what my own experiences were during the Civil Rights Movement.  And then I had the girls spend time writing a short Essay on "I Have A Dream"....

Here were the results.  I found it very interesting how they each personalized today.  It is human nature that we ALL want to be treated equally.  :)

Erika:
"I have a dream that All people wouldn't get mocked or teased just because they are a little different. There are kids out there that get teased because they mumble when they talk, or other kids that have missing parts of their bodies. I myself am one of them. When I walk, I swing sideways. I have arms that look deformed and I have two prosthetic feet. So when I go on short walks or go to the store, people look at me as if I am an alien from another planet. My dream is that someday adults and children will look at all people, black or white, disabled or not, retarded or silent, the way God looks at us.
The Bible says that we are all fearfully and wonderfully made. God knitted us together in our mother's womb the way He wanted us to be. Psalm 139:13-14.
"For you formed my inward part; you knitted me in my mother's womb. I will give thanks to you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made, Wonderful are your works and my soul knows it very well. Amen!"


Anna:
(I am just going to post part of hers... as hers was very similar to the other girls but had a different twist at the end. )
"I want to be a Nation that has a reputation for being kind and not critical. I want people to visit America and go home wishing that their nation could be like ours."

Sarah:

I have a dream that all lpeole would be treated the same; that they would be KIND! I have a dream that people wouldn't be bullied just because they had a fake leg or missing body parts, autism or a different skin color.
I know one thing: I would not want to be treated meanly. People that treat other people that way are called bullies.
If you are just trying to have fun at a park or something and someone is teasing you, on the outside you may act and say it didn't hurt your feelings, but inside your whole body is shaking because you are mad and your feelings ARE hurt. You almost feel sorry for that person.
I have had the experience, and I hope that you don't. But even if you don't look like you have problems, people will try to find a way to hurt you. Everybody has a problem of some kind.
So no matter what, don't let anyone ruin your life and always be kind to everyone. Love your family, friends neighbors, enemies and even bullies. SO my dream is that people wouldn't be bullied or treated wrongly just because of the way God made them.
DON'T BE A BULLY 

And then Alli's (part of which really made me laugh)
I have a dream taht all people who have problems will not be made fun of, because they might get their feelings hurt. Like y sisters; they have people stare at how they walk of how thier legs are shaped. It hurts my feelings that people do that.
I also dream taht I could be a doctor or a teacher so I can help people that have problems. I sometimes think about how lucky people are if they have a fake legs or legs, becasue they won't get cuts or bruises.
I am happy that some people are even alive. I am glad that God gave everybody life to dream and see His miracles .

Love my girl's thoughts. :)

My Sweet Alli

I have to say, I had to smile inside today at Miss Alli.  She has had a bit of a cold and I am one to doctor the kids up abit when they are sick. I have always been this way.  One thing I use is Vicks Vapo-Rub. I put it on their chests and back when they have a cough. 
Today, I had forgotten to do it in the a.m.  I remembered around 10:30 a.m.  I told Alli, "I need to put this on you!"  She said, ""Oh, I was hoping your would forget!" "But really, I was hoping you would remember."
Do you like Mama taking care of you?
"YES"...  and she had a big grin! :)

I felt so special when she said that. She LOVES being taken care of, even if it is rather sticky and stinky. :)

The Late Night Crazies

One last dance.... :)

Our 10 month Alli Update

I am so proud of my little girl.  We ALL are!  She is doing amazing.  We hit our 10 month mark on January 2nd. :)  I am thrilled to say that Miss Alli is sooooo Hooome! 

Other than the incident a few weeks ago due to some insensitive comments made, we have had no meltdowns.  She has been a delight to everybody.    She and I are home sick today from Church, so she is snuggled up on the couch drinking hot tea and watching Super Book cartoons.   :)  

We had a chance a little while ago to talk and reminisce.  I showed her the Russian Orphan Light House Project blog and explained to her that the hosting program is how she was able to come in the first place.   We tried to go back and find pictures and boy did we find a few! Yea! She saw a picture of her sister and her first family holding up a sign waiting for her sister to get off of the plane.  (November 08)
Then,  she saw a picture of herself in that famous bow!   She smiled and said, "Don't they ask to put pictures up?"    She would LOVE to not have that huge bow in her hair. LOL
She could not remember the name of her orphanage, so we emailed the director of the Light House project.  She emailed us back a few minutes ago.... :)  We now KNOW where her orphanage was!

"The name of the orphanage is Yolotchka, and the town was Shumerly, in the Chuvashia region of Russia."

I don't know why I didn't think to ask before! LOL
As we sat together, she was so calm and relaxed and pointed out a few people she knew, and then she said, "You know what mama?" "I hardly ever even think about them anymore."  "It doesn't bother me anymore."  "I love my family."

She is so pleased that she is a Minich.  She is so pleased that she has been here for 10 months and that her birthday is next month! 

So we started discussing what kind of cake she wants. She gets to help bake it, which is tradition and she is totally thrilled by that.  I think we have decided on a chocolate torte with a mixture of creme cheese and nutella for filling, with a chocolate ganache for the icing.... and sparkler candles. 
Daddy will be getting a cheese cake.  His favorite.  (their birthdays are on the same day)

Alli has grown so much I cannot keep track..... she has gained OVER 10 LBS and a few inches.
She woke up yesterday and both Mike and I thought she had grown in her sleep again. LOL

She has improved so much in her personal skills.  It is no longer a battle to get hair brushed. Erika has had a huge impact on her in this area.  She takes good care of herself now.  I get a sense that she really cares about herself, much more than she did before.

 She is probably one of the most creative kids I have met, who can take paper, tape, crayons, scissors and make nearly ANYTHING.  She even made her own envelope to send a letter, and it was a really great job! 

Today, she wanted to make a TV for her Barbie Dolls, so she took some old styrofoam and made a TV with "The Little Mermaid" on the screen. LOL
I cannot wait to post her  1 year update.  It will be one month after her birthday. :)  She is so excited about it. :)

Language Comprehension Funny

This morning Mike was getting ready to leave for church.   (Alli and I are home sick today)
He couldn't locate his wallet.  He said, "The last time I remember having it, was when I  made Steve change."  Steve is our friend.
So I asked, "where were you when you did that?"
Mike said, "In the yard by the wood pile. "

Alli with a surprised look says, "You made Steve change his clothes outside??"  LOL

Daddy said, "No, I made change for his money."  :) 

Thoughts About Emotional Age

I have been doing some reading today and it got me to thinking about when our girls first came home verses where they are now.

Each of them were VERY young emotionally when they were first home, including our oldest adoptee and youngest PRECIOUS daughter,  Miss Alli.... (She was 11 when she came home.)

The things that were common ground among all of them, had to do with finding things around the house and hoarding them.  That means, pencils, scissors, crayons, hair brushes, food items, junk mail, and countless other types of items. 
They ALL did this! 
They would also wear my shoes, or wear them outside and leave them OUTSIDE!   Oh the shoes that I could not find!

The one thing I never thought about, was that it was STEALING.  You know why? Because it WASN'T!
Even though they were old enough to know better gestationally, they were NOT old enough to know better emotionally.
So, instead of accusing them of "stealing".... we simply said, "Oh I see you have my scissors in your room. Those belong in mommy's drawer, can you please put them there?  And the answer would always be yes.  They may wind up in the room again, and the process was repeated. 
We never said, "YOU STOLE MY SCISSORS!"  Because, 1. this would have done nothing to help them, and 2.  Emotionally, they couldn't understand the concept.

When our boys were little, there were all sorts of things I would find in their rooms. Spoons, scissors, paper, FOOD..... I never thought once that it was "stealing".  They were little. They found something interesting or tasty and they wanted it; plain and simple.  Over time, they learned that it was not ok to have certain things and some things were off limits!

In the same way, our children who come to us through adoption learn.  Many times they may be 3 emotionally but 12 physically.  We MUST deal with the 3 year old when it comes to this type of behavior.  Gently letting them know to put things back, not put food in their room, not put their clean socks under the bed, not collect every hair brush in the house or wear mama's shoes ......These are all developmental things that must be learned at the AGE your child is EMOTIONALLY!
To ACCUSE a child who is that young emotionally is damaging to them. It brings them shame and will NOT help them to heal.

I am VERY HAPPY to say after 10 Months of Miss Alli being home, I am no longer looking for pens or scissors. :)  Now, I did have to ask where my shoes were today, but she found them for me right away.  Her wearing my shoes is a compliment actually. :)

I think sometimes we are so quick to accuse... and think badly of our children, when in reality, they are just very young and need instruction.... Once they learn, without SHAME, they catch on very fast, and we can find our scissors! LOL

Really Fun Day

I have to say, today was so enjoyable.  The girls were all so fun. We started with waking up from an all girl slumber party in our room.  From there, Erika and Alli went with me to a few stores to do some needed grocery shopping. We stopped for lunch and and went to World Market. We had such a fun time.  Alli was in AWE of World Market.  Erika said, "I told you she'd love it!"

Thinking about the girls  and how they came to us brought such joy.  Sitting there admiring them, watching them laugh and talk and have such a fun time. pulling myself away and just observing them was so enjoyable. :)
Alli was showing me pictures she had taken with Erika's old camera. (Erika gave Alli her old camera since she got a new one for Christmas)
I cannot describe the feeling of watching those two and thinking about where they were before.  Erika has been home almost 6 years! (hard to believe) And Alli has been home 10 1/2 months.

Interestingly, they both started talking about the first time they met me and what they remember and what they said. We laughed SO Hard! :)

I love days like this. :)

Great Day To Wash the Van

The girlies decided to wash the van because of the great weather. Now I would have been freezing. It is only in the 60's, but after a few 40 degree days, it felt like summer. Almost. :)

You Gotta See This

It appears the little girlies are picking up where their brothers left off, in their love for photography and making video.
They showed me the beginnings of something they are working on for Alli's birthday.  I had tears in my eyes. What a loving thing for them to do. 
Thanks so much for your Creativity Anna. :) Thank you Erika and Sarah for all your advice and input.

These girls just bless me so much. :)

The Versatile Blogger Award

I was very surprised to be the recipient of a blog award.  Thank you so very much Annie, from One Mother's Day.   You are an encouragement to me and I thank you for being such a great mom to your children.

So here's how this works.  There are two parts to it when you are nominated.  First you have to list seven things about yourself that your readers might not know.  Then you pass the love along by nominating (up to) five of your favorite blogs for the award.

So here goes:  SEVEN things that my readers might not know....

1.  I never graduated from College.  That is, unless you consider an MRS degree.  I married after my freshman year.

2.  By the time I was 24 years old, I was mother to 4 young sons.  41/2 , 2 1/2, 1 1/2   and a newborn.
     I got to choose my youngest son's name all by myself. :)  Marcus David. 

3.  I moved so much as a child, I cannot count how many schools I went to; but I had 5 moves in high school and I went to 4 different high schools, one of them twice.

4. I had a WONDERFUL time and experience with Mike in Ukraine.  I LOVED walking the streets of the city and trying to speak Russian at the stores.

5.  I have been working on a book for a LONG time.

6.  I LOVED raising my boys and I LOVE raising my girls.

7.  One time when I was cutting my 3 year old son's hair, I cut his ear accidently.... He moved.
After that, to this day, every person's hair that I cut says, "Don't cut my ear!"  The guys passed that info down to the girls and I will never outlive it!

8.  Technology Scares me. 

9.  I made a New Year's Resolution last year to go paper free with my calendar and I did it!

10.  I  LOVE watching cartoons.  My favorite one: Ben and Me.

11.  I would love to live in Ukraine.

(ok, that was more than 7.... so I'll stop) :)

I guess I'll keep going: :)

12.  Dabba, is my former mother in law, who is very close to me, just as if she were my own mom.
       I have written about her several times. She is AMAZING and I LOVE HER.... She taught me so   much about life and love.

13.  Mike and I have been married for almost 23 years and we are thrilled to be married to each other.

14.  I have the coolest grand children in the world.... Katie and Lilly are the oldest. They are so special to me.  I miss them terribly since they moved to the far away place of New Mexico.



1. Dulce de Leche.  I love how frank and honest and refreshing she is.

2. The Life of Little Eunice    Ivy is so entertaining.  I love her humor, recipes, ideas and stories about her life.

3. The Adventures of Erika    Erika is really doing well at blogging.  She is creative and thoughtful.
      I love reading things from her perspective.  :)

4.  Wrong in All the Right Ways   If you need a good laugh, Catherine's blog is the place to go. She is so funny, and her family is very precious.  It was great to meet her here in Dallas when the girls had surgery.  Love her blog.

5.  Baseballs Butterflies and Blessings   Katie is one amazing mama.  I wish I had my act together as much as she does when I was her age. :)  Katie is full of Spiritual insight and thoughtfulness.  I love how she parents her two precious babies. 


Check out these blogs when you have an opportunity... you will be encouraged and entertained, get great recipes, and insights.

Thank you ladies for being awesome bloggers!

Games

"Girls, we need to bring in some firewood!"
Alli- "Hey I know, we can play a game that we bring in firewood!"  :)
OK!

Alli Got Ahold of My Camera

 I think she likes taking pictures.

  She even took some self portraits. :)

She caught me cooking dinner. :)

Love it!

A Creative Way To Memorize States and Capitals

I decided to take the map down and let the girls play with it.  I asked them, "Do you want to take a road trip?"   I got interesting looks.
"Divide up your cars. The first person who places all their cars on the map wins!"

So I called out the capitals and they had to drive their cars to the destination.  If they got their first, they could leave their car on that state. 

They had a blast!  And it was much funner than just rote memorizing. :)

Family Finances

Mike and I set up our budget in a program we use for our business called Account Edge.  I was looking for simple, but he is looking for me to learn AccountEdge better so I can be more useful in the business. So it was a win-win situation. :)

I have officially entered the purchases made this month into the program and created categories for tracking.  It appears I will be able to track food expenses, gas expenses, clothing expenses, home education expenses, and the possibilities are endless. :) 

On Wednesday, I'll add a category for Dental expenses.

I also want to track savings earmarked for vacation and holidays.  I wonder, if we VISUALLY SEE where we are lacking, if it will help us to prepare better, and make different choices?  We are already pretty frugal, but we can always be more frugal. After all, I really don't need a burrito by Gluten Freeda to make my day. Especially if it is a splurge of $ 2.50, and frankly, didn't taste that good. 

My biggie is also going to be keeping track VERY CLOSELY of receipts.  2 times last year I needed to return something and could NOT find the receipt. Not a good example for the girls.

Gluten Free Fried Chicken

I made this tonight and boy was it good!  I have not fried chicken in YEARS, but for some reason, I just wanted some. :)
There is a rather loose recipe, as all recipes are around here. :)

GLUTEN FREE FRIED CHICKEN

Soak the chicken in buttermilk for a few hours

Pat the chicken dry, salt and pepper it.
Dip the chicken in beaten eggs. (3 will suffice)
dredge it in the coating:
(rice flour mixed with potato starch and spices of your choice....
(I used garlic, paprika, pepper, salt)
Let it rest while oil is heating and dredge it through the flour mixture again.

Fry until done....

Wow! I have to say, it was wonderful. :)

I Just Love The Adorables

I call Marcus and Ivy, Will and Charlie, the Adorables.  Soon, little Olivia will be here to join them, and she will be just as adorable as they are.  Ivy wrote a very important post tonight and I wanted to share it.
You can read it HERE.... and I'll put in in repost here:

Sweet dreams

One thing that is very important to me as a mommy is to make sure my babies go to bed feeling very loved and very secure.  I find that night can feel lonely and I don't want my babies ever feeling alone.

So other than praying with them, cuddling and giving tons of kisses.  I have special little things that I do with them.  Every night I say to Will
"I loved you today more than I loved you yesterday.
And tomorrow I am going to love you even more than I loved you today!
Every day I love you more and more--
More than ever before!"
And now that he has it memorized he repeats it with me.  Then I always act surprised and ask, "how did you know?!"  "because I am so smart!" he says.

Charlie's language is just not there yet for something like that.  So I just tell him every night that he is a gift from God to me.  He laughs and says, "noooooo..... Will gift!"  He is just so precious; I could eat him up.

My children really are a blessings and I love each one so so so so much.
Oh how I love my daughter in law Ivy. :)  She captures motherhood so very well, and shows that mommys are so very important to their little ones.  She leads them in rituals that to some, don't seem important, but in reality..... She is having a very powerful effect on her babies. (our babies) :)

I read an article today on brain function and how children who are not snuggled, cuddled, nurtured are forever changed in the brain.  It was a NYtimes article.
The article states that the lack of nurturing and care in the early years, can have catastrophic effects on a person.
I am SOOOO GLAD that Will, Charlie and Olivia, will not have the experience of a lack of love or attention, because Marcus and Ivy fully recognize their role and responsibility as parents.
Raising emotionally healthy children is one of the most important things a person can do.... Those children, will rule the world someday.... :)

Who knows, between all those grandsons I may know who to vote for eventually! :)

Ilse and Ems

So Sweet! :)

Russian/Ukrainian Christmas

Today is Orthodox Christmas.  We had our very first Christmas Meal on January 7th.  It included traditional Salad, Pelmeni and then Borscht.  Our desert was those Russian Cookies that are chocolate covered wafers. 
It was really fun!

What Do You Do When Damaging Words Are Spoken?

I wrote a blog post a couple of days ago called "THINGS NOT TO SAY!" 
I wanted to give an update on what happened and why our WORDS are SO VERY important.  I also want to share how I personally feel about situations like this, and what good can come from them.

If you read my linked post, a relative visited and said, "If you don't like this home you can come home with me!" 
This statement was made to a child who has been removed from her first home into an orphanage, then adopted by Americans, rejected by them, then sent to respite care, rejected once again by the first family, then sent to a Psych Unite for Evaluation, rejected once again by the first family, back to respite care then on to another adoptive family and rejected by them once again.  BOTH families spoke things I cannot write here. Things that SHOULD NEVER BE SAID.

Now, this relative KNOWS this.  She also KNOWS that Alli is fragile. She is doing well, has been doing very well, but she is still fragile.
To say I am upset about it is an understatement.  I am mama-bear angry.

Alli has struggled the last few days to gain her stability back.  She went from being a family member, to feeling like an outsider.  She has been dysregulated off and on and still says the statement really scared her.  It put her RIGHT BACK WHERE SHE WAS BEFORE SHE CAME HOME.
It has been hard work over the past couple of days to reassure her of our love for her, that she is not an outsider and does not pick her family when this one doesn't work out, because THIS ONE WILL WORK OUT! 
She was already worrying about what she was going to do and where she was going to go. 
Logically she knows she is staying.... but emotionally, she was walling up and protecting her heart, which means she began to lash out. 
To the average person, that lashing out made no sense.  But to us, it made total sense.
I have to say, I have the most awesome  husband and daughters.

They are all outside playing together right now, and being very forgiving.  Working through all the hurts of the past really HURTS.... A scab was pulled off and is beginning to heal once again.

A scab was pulled off for me too, and my wounds hurt too.... this relative is just difficult.

As for Mike and I, we made the decision FOR the forseeable future.... that this relative will not be able to come to  our home.   We will not be bringing the girls to their home.  We will make calls and be kind, but I cannot take this chance again.  It has happened before with our other girls, and we have been very guarded as to not cause our girls undue injury to their hearts.

I am saddened that Mike's mom and dad are no longer alive to be grand parents to our girls. :( 
But, we have the local nursing home and Miss Joy brings all of us Joy every week when we see her for Church. :)

Today, started out hard, with our sweetie once again feeling sad and totally vulnerable, convinced this family was not going to work, even though she is quite happy. Poor kid. :(

This afternoon, after praying and talking and just letting her talk it out, and her listening to me talk too, we are doing much better.

I was also able to use this a little for our good. I say a "little" because I'm still upset.  But we did talk to our girls about how to respond when people say stupid things.  We can take them and own them, or we can reject them as dumb comments that have no value or meaning.  It is like letting rude comments fall on deaf ears.
It is time for Miss Alli to take her stance on this and say "I AM A MINICH!"  And this may catapult her into having more ability to do just that! 

WE ARE TEAM MINICH~!

An Update on Perspectives

I posted yesterday about family friends who's 7 year old daughter has a brain tumor. They just found out yesterday evening, she had an emergency procedure done last night, and then tomorrow, they will have surgery to try and remove the tumor. 
Please pray for this precious family.  Here is the latest update.   They will know tomorrow if the tumor is benign or cancerous.  I cannot imagine.

It is a large brain tumor, approx 5cm x 5.6cm x 7cm . . . it has flattened Andrea's cerebellum into the shape of a pancake, and there is a build-up of intracranial pressure. The doctors believe it is likely a Juvenile Pilocytic Astrocytoma (JPA) tumor.