So What About The Disciples??

Jesus was arrested from the Garden of Gethsemane, where Judas betrayed him with a Kiss.  There were about 1,000 soldiers who came to arrest ONE UNARMED MAN!

THE DISCIPLES FLED!  Yes, even Peter, who said he would DIE for Christ; the same guy who cut off the soldiers ear and Christ had to put it back and heal it..... FLED....

He followed close by and people recognized him.  He denied he ever knew Christ in no uncertain terms, even CURSING at the ones to exposed him!

Then the cock crowed.... and he was reminded of what Christ had told him.  He wept bitterly.

The LORD, the MASTER lay COLD AND DEAD in a borrowed tomb, provided by Joseph of Aramathia.

There must have been so much confusion!  There were so many things that happened: The dead raised, the blind were given sight, the deaf had their hearing restored, the crippled walked, lives were changed, RADICALLY!  There was NOTHING quiet about Jesus.  He was  a RADICAL CHANGER OF LIFE and all who came in contact with him knew it!

He had the words of Eternal life, yet there He lay, in a tomb.  He was beaten beyond recognition, his beard ripped out, he was exposed as a common criminal, nailed to a wooden cross and left to suffocate in agony.
YET even in that state...... He forgave.  He forgave those who sneered and jeered at him and those who hated him, despised him; He loved.

The Physical PUNISHMENT was not even the worst part.  He who KNEW NO SIN, BECAME SIN FOR US.  He didn't just die for present day or past day sin. He died for the sin of ALL mankind, taking it ALL upon himself ALL AT ONE TIME, including MY sin, YOUR sin, and our future sin.
The burden is unfathomable to even try to grasp.  Every SIN on him was layed..... EVERY.
Every murder, rape, lie, theft, sexual sin, perversion, thought.... HE BORE.

The disciples were HIDING!  They were scared, terrified.... The shepherd had been struck, and the sheep had scattered....

I contemplate what I would have thought had I been there at that time.  Would I have fled?  Would I have been inconsolable? Confused?  Angry?  Frightened?

I am sure all of those things. 

They scattered and hid..... I wonder if they were making plans to head back to their homes and resume their previous lives? 

Today I ponder what it was like to be alive during that time; the time  when Christ was dead.

Good Friday Thoughts

Good Friday is a very important day on the Christian's Calendar.  It is the day Christ, our Lord was crucified, SACRIFICED for our sin.
He was perfect. We are sinful.
He LOVED us, even when we hated Him.

Scripture says in Romans 8:15, For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”


It has never been more clear to me in my life, what this verse means, than it has  in the last nine years, since we have experienced Adoption first hand.  This verse has come to life.  "We are not slaves and we have no reason to fall back into fear.  We are SONS of the most high God.  And Son's call their father Daddy.  DADDY!


There was a HEAVY and HIGH price payed to ransom me from sin.  The death of a first born son. The death of the Creator-God who was WITH HIM from the very beginning.  He was eternally existent, yet came to DIE the death of a common criminal  to ransom mankind.

WOW...JUST WOW!


And because of His sacrifice, I am free. I am NOT a slave to sin. My girls are not SLAVES to SIN OR FEAR, but they can find HEALING at the cross of  Christ.

We have done nothing to deserve this.  It was offered freely.  Why?  Because God LOVED the World, and chose to show it in this way.  He proved His love for his own creation by redeeming us.

There is no reason for fear. With our girls, sometimes they forget !
Sometimes they step back into fear, forgetting they are part of family now.  We do the same in the family of God.  Sometimes we forget. 

God is wonderful in reminding us through His word, through others and through the Spirit..... REMEMBER who you are! I have called you!
Yes, we have been called out of darkness into His marvelous light!

So while today is about His DEATH and SUFFERING..... and it must have been unimaginable for the Holy Lamb of God to BECOME SIN for us.  He who Knew NO SIN... became sin. :(

We already know the rest of the story.  Sunday is coming..... and the GRAVE COULD NOT HOLD HIM!  

But for today and tomorrow, we contemplate the gravity of our sin, and WHO died for us, and why.

Easter Weekend

We had a wonderful Easter Weekend.  Here are few pictures:

Sponge Curlers.... Can't wait to see how it turns out! :)

 My lovely ladies. They are growing up before our eyes! WOW! (In 2 months we will have 3 teenagers and 1 12 year old)  YIKES!

 Anna's hair do. :)   Anna wanted to try curlers.  I thought her hair turned out darling!

Erika wore a new shirt.  She doesn't care for dresses....they are hard for her to feel lady like in. So we concentrate on tops instead. :)

Two peas in a pod. They love dressing alike. I'm glad I found new outfits for them ON SALE!

 I really enjoyed being a part of the Trio to sing Easter Song, on Easter Sunday!

Miss Joy helping peel eggs

Miss Joy is just so precious to us.  She is more like a gramma to the girls.  Miss Joy never had children, so she loves being around the girls.  She really liked helping peel the eggs. She doesn't get to feel very useful at the Nursing home.

Helping Mom get dinner ready

Making Deviled Eggs.  We really like deviled eggs a LOT.... So everybody helped make them.

We had a wonderful feast. :)  And a lovely celebration of the resurrection of our Lord.  And all in all, this weekend was just so relaxing and enjoyable! We didn't plan anything over the top hard. I made a bbq brisket on Saturday, so we could have it on Sunday. 
The girls were all so helpful getting things ready for our dinner. 
This year Miss Alli knew what to expect, and her memories of Easter, were from OUR HOUSE from Last year! YEA! 
The girls did have an Easter Egg Hunt.  They still like to do that, and that is OK! (except Anna. She was feeling especially grown up) :)   This year I bought a laundry basket, instead of 4 individual baskets. How is that for practical? LOL    I put all their things in it together. :)  And now, I have a laundry basket that we really needed too. :)

Happy Resurrection Day!

Up from the grave He Arose! With a mighty triumph or' His foes!
He arose TRIUMPHANT from the dark domain
And He Lives FOREVER with His Saints to reign!
HE AROSE!
HE AROSE!
Halelujah! Christ AROSE!
That was an old song from long ago....
Today..... we will be singing another NOT so old song.... :)
 

HAPPY EASTER!

Secret Ambition

We Made It Through Easter Weekend! Yea!

I wrote earlier about Anniversaries here...
We had a great weekend.  Mike and I had a long talk about how to make the weekend MEMORABLE, but not over the top, not losing focus on the PURPOSE for the weekend;the resurrection of Jesus Christ !

We decided the best thing to do was keep busy!  So, on Good Friday we finished watching Jesus of Nazareth, and did some more art and painting.  We also went to the art store and purchased Alli's new Life Book.  She got to pick it out with stickers that she loved, all at 50 percent off! Yea!
We went out to an economical  lunch at Taco Bueno and then headed home. She decided to sort the life book sticker box, and that took her a few hours! Then, our regular Friday Night Pizza night was taken up with Ben Hur....
On Saturday, we went and purchased hay for the goats and feed.  We talked about Easter Baskets and Easter Egg Hunts, and Miss Alli picked out her basket.  She was Soooo excited!
 We surprised the girls with a trip to see "African Cats", which, by the way, was FABULOUS!
Everybody had a great time, and the girls dressed up with French Braided Hair. :)  So cute!
We all went to bed, and then in the a.m. it was time to get ready for Church.....but not before checking out the Easter Baskets. :)  She was sooooo excited... as were the other girlies. :)
And then we were off to church, all sugared up. :)
During Church, she whispered, "Are we really going to have an egg hunt?" Yes dear, we are.... but right now, we are at worship.... LOL  She and Erika snuggled up during the sermon.
As SOON as church was over, she was ready to go. I told her, no, we need to wait a little. Her window of tolerance was definitely lowered by now.... So I told her just a few minutes so mommy can talk, and then we'll go.
She waited and wound up having fun talking with a few new friends.
When we got home, I went and hid the eggs and the girlies changed clothes. Then, I worked on dinner while Daddy went out and took pictures.   Oh My, she was like a bull getting ready for a rodeo.... as soon as the door opened she was OFF and Running!  LOL
They were entertained with finding eggs for quite some time.... and then lunch was ready.
It was a wonderful day. She had sooooo much fun, until bedtime. 
She didn't want to go to bed. But it was TIME!
I told her that to disobey, there is no option.
So we headed to the rocking chair and within, a few minutes, she had apologized and was off to bed.
I am soooo PROUD of her!
And now, I'm going to go collapse......
Happy Resurrection Day everybody! :)

Easter Egg Hunting and Dad's Gift

 Sarah, where are your shoes???????

 Looking in the tall grass.

 Get it before the Goat gets it!

Comparing treasures

After the girls looked at their gifts this a.m.   Daddy showed his off...... I gave him "The Voyage of the Dawn Treader DVD".
Now, the girls were VERY excited about that and Sarah asked, "When are we gonna see it!!!!!"
Daddy said, "hmmmm how about Christmas Eve?"
And this was the look on her face:

LOL! :)  She said, "Are you kidding me!"  
Time shall tell! :)

HE IS RISEN!

Happy Resurrection Day!!!!

Anniversaries

I have posted about this before, somewhere down there over the last few years. :)  But the Silent Anniversary Clock has come to visit. 
Many of you know that Holidays can be triggers for bad memories.  One thing that helps with this is keeping the children busy creating NEW memories.  Each new Holiday brings an old trauma back up to the surface, and we get to know what happened in our sweeties past,  which helps us understand them better and better.
One of the benefits of adopting older children is they can talk. :)  They can share what is on their hearts and even though they may not know why they are afraid or why they are upset, as they talk through things, all of the sudden everything fits together.

Easter Week is here and our sweetie was excited about it. She still is, but yesterday, we saw her starting to shut down a little bit.... she started talking about her first family. All of the sudden all these memories were raw and there. 
She had asked last week about an Easter Egg hunt. "Are we going to have one? Can I hunt for them?"
Yes, and yes!  Then she was quiet about it all week.  As the week has gone by, she became more anxious about it... and then yesterday:  "I didn't get to, because they said I was too old."
Ahhh.....
Now it is no crime to tell somebody they are too old for something... it may seem perfectly reasonable, UNLESS that somebody has a trauma background and may be MUCH younger than their given age.
In our sweetie's case, this is what we believe is true.
OR, it is something they KNEW to look forward to and then it was taken away because it wasn't something celebrated... each family is different.
We don't believe in Santa Clause, but when Anna came, she was VERY worried about Santa not knowing where she lived. I wasn't about to tell her there is no Santa!  That would have been a terrible thing to do. Instead, we took her to see Santa and made sure he knew where she lived; even sent a letter.  It was what she NEEDED at that time.  There is plenty of time for things to change into a more regular celebration as we CREATE new memories!

Alli is still nervous if the Easter Egg Hunt is really going to happen. She was too old last year. What will be different this year?
I told her that I am going to race her for eggs, because I want candy too! "Don't you think Mama's deserve some of that candy!"  She looked shocked! LOL

Yesterday, we took a special trip to the store to pick out her "empty" Easter basket. This will help to ease the anxiety of not knowing if it will really happen, really.  She picked out a very nice basket.
So now she KNOWS there is one, and just that simple gesture, has caused her great relief.

Today we are keeping busy with activity, and scrap booking....and tonight we will do more activity to keep her engaged....
(distracted with purpose) :)
We rearranged our pretty eggs into a more suitable jar....and so far, this a.m., it seems that she is happy and relaxed once again...now that she knows there is going to be that basket. :)

We are also CREATING NEW MEMORIES for her to grasp, so that next year, she will say, "Oh yes! I remember doing that!"

Why Did Jesus Sweat Drops of Blood

I have been contemplating a statement made by somebody recently, that if you experience any anxiousness when dealing with a problem, it is because you aren't trusting God.

A good friend today told me that after the death of a close family member, she was told something similar.....as if we aren't supposed to feel.

There is no doubt that as a believer, we are to trust the Father.... but we are also in Human Flesh.
Included in our flesh are all the emotions that GOD gave to us.

There is much speculation about Christ sweating drops of blood.  I have read that it is  possible, but only in an intense emotional state.
"Sweating drops of blood is not unknown in medicine but it is a rare occurrence. The clinical word for it is "hematohidrosis". It can happen when the blood vessels around the sweat glands constrict (due to extreme stress) and then dilate to the point of rupture. The blood is released from the body through the sweat glands."
Jesus prayed in the Garden, "Father if it is possible, Let this cup pass from me, but Let YOUR will be done!"  He was obedient to crucifixion, and he was WILLING, but that does not mean he didn't have anxiousness over the process.

The Creator God, the one who was eternally existent with the Father, was about to DIE...as in DEAD, as in FLESH DEAD AND ROTTING....AND.... he was about to experience this through Crucifixion, one of the worst tortures in Human History.
But even with that, I do not believe that is what he was concerned about...... I REALLY think the anxiety He was feeling was all about taking on the SIN of the WORLD.... all at once, bearing our SIN and the Punishment of that Sin.  The scripture says in 2 Corinthians 5:21, "He Who KNEW NO SIN, BECAME sin for us!"

I have no idea what it is like to be without sin. I was born in sin. I have always lived in a sinful world.
I do not like sin. I do not like the burden of sin. I do not like the guilt of sin. I do not ..... but I do NOT know what it would have been like to be SINLESS and PERFECT..... Jesus DID.

Sometimes we all look at the awfulness of the cross, and it WAS awful, and forget about the Awfulness of our Sinful Nature.... how really REALLY awful Sin is.
I am so thankful that Jesus Christ took on MY sin.... and has been faithful to cleanse me and wash me white as snow.  That is a standing that I have with the Heavenly Father now..... but the effects of sin and my sin nature are still there, and it is a daily, moment by moment battle to bring the flesh into submission; one that I fail often.... but one HE ACCOMPLISHED in my stead.
And it didn't END at His DEATH.... HE CONQUERED DEATH! He ROSE AGAIN!
HE LIVES! INDEED HE DOES!

Amazing Love.... Amazing Grace

Easter Thoughts

Has anybody ever tried to be perfect?  I remember when I was a little girl, I was growing up in a very black and white world where what you did wrong was bad and you were condemned.... what you did right was good and you were not condemned.  It was a very works oriented little life I had.

I remember very well telling my mother one time, "I am so proud of myself. I have not been spanked for 5 whole days! (I was about 9 at that time)  Somehow, I got a spanking that afternoon.  :/
I wish I could remember what it was for, but I can't.  I just remember the feeling of utter failure.  I had sinned yet again....

Our son Joseph, when learning his times tables came down stairs very upset one night. He had figued out that 70 x's 7 was 490, and he just KNEW he had sinned more than 490 times, therefore there was no more room for forgiveness for him!  Poor guy. LOL

The keeping of the law isn't good enough... doing good for others isn't good enough.... according to 1 Corinthian's 13, giving my body up to be burned isn't good enough... selling all I have and giving it to the poor isn't good enough... and the list goes on.  The thing is, it isn't about Law..... The Law was given as a tutor to show us that we are unable to keep it.  The Pharisees did the best and had made laws upon laws to keep it.  But Jesus cut through all that when he made it a "Heart Issue"..... yep, being perfect to the letter of the law and not the heart of the law lands you right back to our inevetible state of sinfulness.... because we ARE sinners. Every single one of us.

So, who is good enough?  The scripture in First John says, "If we say we have not sinned, then the truth is not in us!" We are liars.....  But if we CONFESS our sin, HE, our Savior, Jesus Christ,  the holy and Resurrected one, the one who spoke everything into creation, as it says in John 1- In the Beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the word WAS God, He was in the beginning with God. Through him was everything made, and nothing was made without Him.
He, the only one who IS good enough, is faithful and just to forgive us our sin and cleanse us from ALL unrighteousness.

Because of our very nature being sinful....our very being, sinful, we are NOT in right relationship with God.  It is HIS desire that ALL come to Him.  He is EVER LOVING, EVER PATIENT, Wanting No one to be lost in sin.
Our perfection is IN CHRIST.... He is our Hope, He is our Salvation, through FAITH, not of works.
Does that mean we say we believe and go on sinning? Of course not.  In Romans 12- Paul says that we are changed by the renewing of our minds. God is at work in us, changing us little by little, step by step, and bringing us closer into His Eternal Kingdom.  The Kingdom is NOW... The kingdom isn't a die and go to heaven kingdom, though that is a promise.... but the Life we have in Christ starts HERE and NOW!
Faith and trust in our Savior is an amazing journey.....


And then, that walk of faith, will be a walk of intimate trust, of communing with Our Lord and Trusting Him to the End. He came to us as a servant, emptied himself of his Glory, and was a servant unto death.....a criminal's death.  It was the path that God had chosen, sending His son.
What an enormous picture of Love, that God, not sparing His own Son, gave him up, so that we might become Sons.....
Jesus, the perfect Lamb.... sacrificed for our sins.  Wow....


I will never be good enough..... Christ suffered in my place. He payed the penalty for my sin.
I am eternally in awe of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords who NOW sits in the Heavenlies, with a name Higher than any other......
 Yes, Jesus Christ is Lord.... Our incarnate Lord, come in the Flesh, Crucified, BODILY RESURRECTED on the 3rd day and Ascended back to the Father....The 2nd Adam, who is the FIRST BORN of the New Creation, who has a GLORIFIED BODY... which I someday will have, RULES.


And I am REALLY thankful that He does.

Painted Eggs

We painted these blown out eggs this week.  I thought they turned out pretty neat!
 What do eggs have to do with Easter?
I was looking this up several years ago when somebody said Eggs are Pagan.
Every thing seems to have Pagan origins.  I would have to say Christmas Trees DEFINITELY do!
But we celebrate Christmas, and use a tree.

So, in my very little research on Easter Eggs.... we found that the Earliest Christians DID celebrate with decorated Eggs, the Resurrection of Jesus Christ from the Dead.  Eggs symbolize new life.

If we use our eggs as a representation of the tomb, and we have blown them out, and there is nothing inside.... that is a great symbol of the resurrection of Christ. :)
The tomb was opened, but Jesus was NOT there!

We also like to do the little decoration for the easter table of the Tomb with the stone and in the A.M., when everybody wakes, the stone is rolled away!
This year, I also want to bake Resurrection cookies.  They are a cookie made of egg white, and they cook to form an empty tomb..... :)

What are some of the traditions you hold for Resurrection Sunday?

Miss Alli has requested an Easter Egg Hunt.  She is very excited about it.

Easter Week

One of the biggest Christian celebrations is upon us.....and we are so excited to Celebrate the Resurrection!

Starting off with one of my favorite songs:

 

What a Wonderfully Full Week

I am rejoicing in the wonderful week we had. It was BUSY, but a good sort of busy.
We started with our Seder on Tuesday night. Then we had an Easter Lunch with friends and the girls had a wonderful time. We watched the movie Jesus of Nazareth over the week, a little at a time. It is about 6 hours long. (just finished it tonight)
We were able to visit our Children's church in Mckinney and had a wonderful Easter dinner and musical. We then went to Ministry Group last night and came home to collapse at around midnight.
Easter Sunday morning was wonderful and the message was awesome. After that, we went over to a friend's house for an Easter Lunch. What a wonderful season to remember the Resurrection of our Savior.

Spring is certainly here. Everything is alive and greening up. Such a wonderful time of year.

Easter Song

I remember when Easter song was written by Annie Herring. She is one of the sisters in the group 2nd Chapter of Acts, which was quite popular during my youth. The video was taken in what looks like to be the 70's.... But the sound is great. They were AMAZING and this still remains one of my all time favorite Easter Songs.
Annie said that she asked the Lord for a gift for Easter, and He gave her "Easter Song". :)

The Power of the Cross

Passover

We celebrated Passover tonight with our first family Seder. I think we are going to do this every year. It was very meaningful. We wanted to attend a Seder, but couldn't find one for tonight, but we were able to watch one on the internet, participating with Baruch Hashem, a messianic fellowship in Dallas.


I looked up how to prepare the Seder meal on the internet, and had everything prepared.
The girls were especially excited about being able to eat! The Seder included an explanation of Seder and it's history, so was a little long winded, but really good.

Instead of Roasted Eggs, I used hard boiled. We had horseradish, celery, eggs, (instead of parsley we used romaine lettuce, we used salted water with vinegar, and raisins with sunflower seeds.
I didn't know what to do with not having bones from a lamb, and when Mike asked about it, I said, "I'm not sure what to do".... and then, it dawned on me, I need to check the freezer. And low and behold there was a Leg of Lamb from last year FROZEN and ROASTED already! :)
So, we added Lamb. :)Here are a few pics of the girls eating "Bitter HERBS"


I was really amazed at the Matza bread. The 3 pieces of bread in one bag, and the middle one taken away and broken.
We really had an interesting night. :)
I think Erika enjoyed it.