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― C. S. Lewis

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Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Fifty Five and Still Learning

So this is the face of 55. :)


And these are the hands of 55. :)


This was an interesting year.  I was nervous to turn 54.  It seems silly, to be nervous, but my father died at 54.  The entire year that was on my mind.  He was so young.  I miss my dad.

So now, I'm 55 and older than my dad.  That is surreal.

I am so thankful for each day, each breath, each life that I come into contact with, and so thankful for God's intervening, causing lives to intersect, divine appointments, and just such a rich life of love.

I am so thankful for family and friends who are so special.  I am thankful for the good times and the deserts.  The "eremos".
On Sunday, when we were in Skiatook Oklahoma, the Pastor at Lakeview Baptist Church talked about the desert experiences we have, that are a part of the Christian walk.

We had a mountain top experience last weekend,when Alli and Tatyana were reunited, and we met new friends in the process.
However, when we got home, I was faced with a few emails that hurt my heart beyond belief.
While the person didn't mean for her comments to be "personal", they were VERY personal to me.

I had sat that Sunday watching a young couple lovingly care for their severely handicapped child.
I was thinking to myself, how isolated they must feel in such a small town. 
I remember feeling very isolated when our Tim was so very young.  There was nobody I knew that had a child which such severe special needs, or any special needs for that matter.
(back then, Children didn't normally survive being so premature)
I thought about the precious ministry my Daughter In Law has with other parents of children who have special needs.  I couldn't help but go over and hug her and ask if she had heard about "Hope's Seed".
She hadn't, and NOW she has! :)
I know that Emily will minister to this mama's heart!

And now back to the emails.....
The gest of them had to do with a child who has developmental delays and how this child will never live on their own and that nobody would ever love this child......but worse.

Something in me just snapped.  I couldn't help it.  I was so angry.  I was so offended, because my sweet grand daughter may never live on her own.  I was told my Tim would never live in HIS own, let alone, LIVE!

I LOVE my grand daughter and I LOVE my Tim, and I LOVE Erika and Sarah! ( I LOVE ALL of my children and grand children) :)  We were told Erika was an imbicile that would never live on HER own! "Why would you want to adopt such a child?"  I hurt to hear those words! And Erika is NO imbicile! She is precious, and smart and she will most CERTAINLY be able to live independently!

And YES our son Tim was considered profoundly mentally retarded, and the schools treated him just that way, telling us he couldn't learn.  They lied.

Handicaps, physical or intellectual do NOT define an individual!   Those citizens in our lives who have special needs enrich our lives IF we let them.  They are some of the strongest, bravest people I know.   I know many folks, old and young who are considered "less than" by many.  They are mistreated, and there is extreme prejudice in our society towards those who are deemed weaker.

But, for those of us who know personally,  the preciousness of each and every life God has ordained to walk this earth,  we see the blessings that have come through very dark times.  Sometimes   God's blessings do not come through rainbows....they come through tears.
May I be so bold to say.... if we don't have hard times, we won't be able to see the blessings?

So, back to the email again....
I let the person know how deeply offending the comments were.  It wasn't mean, it was just factual; but it was not gracious either, and it was not received.   And I most likely blew my testimony.  And for that I am humbled and sorrowful. :(

I need to remember and keep in mind that ALL of us have Special Needs; even those of us who don't know it.
We are all poor and naked and broken before a mighty and Holy God.  We are all sinners, who God, in His great mercy, LOVES and forgives.

So, it is my birthday today... and I am so thankful for my family.  I am thankful that God is not finished teaching me and picking me up when I fall down.

I am thankful for the mountaintops and for the deserts.... He is there, in both.



So thankful to the Lord today that He is still molding and shaping my life. 
Today He has seen fit to bless me with some pretty severe nerve pain in my back.
I always take this as a message to slow down and pray.
May I spend the rest of my days bringing glory to Him!

4 comments:

astudentinkolkata said...

Happy birthday, Christie :)

God bless you and your wonderful family, always!

-K

Fatcat said...

Well we all blow it occasionally. Remember, Jesus lost his temper at the temple merchants. Don't be so hard on yourself.

Have a blessed birthday.

Today is my daughter's 17th birthday. :-)

Emily Minich said...

Hugs. Loves.

Karen said...

Happy Birthday! I appreciated this post.

I love the "Blessings" song you linked in there. I first heard it last fall at the funeral for a young mom friend of ours. It applies to so many parts of life and is now one of my favorite songs. I was pleasantly surprised to find the music in the latest piano book I bought. :-)

You Are Still Holy

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