The Minich Family Blog: Every Family Has A Story...Welcome To Ours
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Tim's Birthday
Monday, February 14, 2011
Happy Valentine's Day Thoughts
Happy Valentine's Day to all... especially My Mike.On the Subject of Love.....
What is Love Exactly! It is amazing how many ways we use the word Love.
I "Love" Pizza!
I "Love" chocolate!
I "Love" my shoes!
I "Love" my husband!
I "Love" my children!
Somehow, this over used word loses it's true meaning when we apply it to food and clothing.
So, since Love is an abstract word, it is hard to understand it's meaning sometimes.
The Bible has a wonderful description of Love in 1 Corinthians 13.
This chapter not only explains what love IS, it also says what LOVE isn't.
One of the stand out portions of this scripture is:
If I speak with the tongues of Men and Angels but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have prophetic powers, understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I AM NOTHING. If I give away all I have and if I deliver up my body to be burned but have not love, I gain NOTHING.
Does this mean that I could actually sacrifice all that I have, and actually NOT love?
YES!
Love, is a verb YES, but it is NOT just giving everything up sacrificially with the "woe is me, look at all the sacrifices I am giving up for you!"
TRUE LOVE is patient and kind! KIND! Not resentful! True love does not envy or boast.
True love does not rejoice when something bad happens to somebody or in wrong doing, but rejoices in the truth.
TRUE LOVE BEARS ALL THINGS, HOPES ALL THINGS, ENDURES ALL THINGS and it never, EVER ends!
Thursday, February 10, 2011
A Morning Cup of Feminine Joe
each day while chatting about various topics......
Earl Grey is my Favorite! What is yours?
Joseph's Birthday Today!
He taught me so much, just by being himself. :)
I really like this picture! LOL
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Our Beautiful Truman
He live EON's away! :(
BUT..... His Mommy Becca has emerged from early babyhood and is blogging again!
YEA!!!!!
You can visit her blog HERE! :)
I love all of my daughter's in law..... Becca is a VERY SWEET mama! She loves her sons so very much and you can see it in her blogging. She is an awesome photographer and is a wonderful wife to our son Joseph.
Glad to see you blogging again Becca!
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
A Thought Provoking Quote by John Piper
"The Gospel is not a picture of adoption, adoption is a picture of the Gospel". .. john piper
Monday, February 7, 2011
Pain
Folks, we live in a fallen world.... and it hurts to see all the pain that surrounds us.
I pray that the Lord will surround these people with His LOVE and Compassion. I pray that He will heal their hearts, souls, wounds, diseases, and that He will open the hearts of those who oppose Him.
I pray that the Lord will bring peace in the midst of terrible storms. Comfort in the midst to trauma and loss. Peace and healing in dealing with disease, and Spiritual Wholeness and Life to all. I pray that the Lord will DIRECTLY INTERVENE in the cases of adoptions being held up by Evil.
I pray for continued Miracles.
My heart is broken and overwhelmed tonight......
Thank you Lord for allowing us to bear each other's burdens and hold each other in our prayers.
I give all of these to you...... YOU HOLD us ALL in your hands....your merciful, loving hands.
Please join me in prayer for all of these unspoken requests.
Thanks
Gluten Free Oatmeal Cookies
Oat Meal Cookies
1 cup of butter
1 1/4 cups white sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar packed
2 TSP Vanilla extract
3 eggs
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp baking soda
5 cups of Bob's Redmill Gluten Free Oatmeal
1 cup of Tapioca Flour
1 cup of raisins (optional)
1 cup of chocolate chips (optional)
(I like the taste of the raisins and chocolate together.)
Beat butter sugars eggs and Vanilla together until creamy
Add flour, soda, salt and oatmeal
Mix VERY well.
Preheat oven to 350ยบ
line a pan with parchment paper
bake for about 8-10 minutes or until desired doneness
do not remove from parchment onto wire racks until slightly cooled
If you removed when they are too hot they will fall apart.
1 cup of butter
1 1/4 cups white sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar packed
2 TSP Vanilla extract
3 eggs
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp baking soda
5 cups of Bob's Redmill Gluten Free Oatmeal
1 cup of Tapioca Flour
1 cup of raisins (optional)
1 cup of chocolate chips (optional)
(I like the taste of the raisins and chocolate together.)
Beat butter sugars eggs and Vanilla together until creamy
Add flour, soda, salt and oatmeal
Mix VERY well.
Preheat oven to 350ยบ
line a pan with parchment paper
bake for about 8-10 minutes or until desired doneness
do not remove from parchment onto wire racks until slightly cooled
If you removed when they are too hot they will fall apart.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
"Stylish Blogger Award"
A fellow bloggy world friend, Katie, whom I was able to meet late last year at the President's 5K in honor of Texas Scottish Rite Hospital, and fellow mommy to a precious daughter with Arthrogryposis.... btw- one of the cutest babies ever..... gave me this "Stylish Blogger Award"...... If anybody is in need of an spiritual Uplift, read Katie's blog! She is a huge blessing from the Lord. She has insight that many times just blesses me so very much!
Now, Stylish? LOL
I am the no makeup, sweat wearing, wearing my husband's sweat socks to keep warm kinda girl. LOL
BUT THANK YOU! It is very sweet to know others read. :)
Now, Stylish? LOL
I am the no makeup, sweat wearing, wearing my husband's sweat socks to keep warm kinda girl. LOL
BUT THANK YOU! It is very sweet to know others read. :)
Upon receiving this award, I am supposed to:
1) Thank, and link back to the person who awarded it.
2) Share 7 things about myself.
3) Award 10 great bloggers.
4) Contact these bloggers and tell them about the award.
7 Things about myself:
1. I Love the Lord Jesus Christ and want to glorify Him in all I do.
I fail at that many times a day. But I know HE knows and picks me up and holds me in his Hands.
2. I have been a Mom since I was 20 years old. I still think it is an amazing, wonderful, thrilling, gift.....
3. I am a Ya-Ya, and there is great joy in Ya-Ya-hood. :)
4. One of the biggest pleasures in my life was teaching a group of 4th - 6th graders for a Wednesday Night Bible study. They were sort of the "reform class" like in Reform school.... and all the teachers would quit after a few weeks. I volunteered. These kids were in need of serious truth. So we started a simple verse by verse bible Study through the book of John and little lives were transformed in that class. I miss those kids. (they are all grown up now) :)
5. I waited all week to go outside so I wouldn't fall on the ice. I have this bad habit of falling on ice and it takes a while to get over. So I kept a really safe distance from the porch, or made sure the snow was heavy enough not to slip. And then, last night my daughter in law called. I went in my BEDROOM to talk to her, sat in the antique rocking chair and it BROKE, throwing me back.... I was so embarrassed that I didn't make a peep, but while we were talking, it took me about 5 minutes to get out of that mess.
And yes, today I am sore! UGH
6. I am actually an Introvert. For some reason that shocks people. :)
7.I still don't know how to wear my hair! (that's deep) LOL
Now, for 10 bloggers awards:
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Facing The Giants
Frankly, THIS movie is the REAL SUPER BOWL...... it was really good on many fronts.
Glad we watched it. :)
Friday, February 4, 2011
I think our Little Ukrainian is loving this snow!
Is This Really Texas?????
The SuperBowl activities have been hampered all week, not that it has effected us personally,
but I do feel for all the folks who came for the event. I feel especially for the small businesses that are losing out on all that revenue! Our business has been a ghost town all week.
Mike had to go out and get hay for the animals again to put in the shelters and he said it was pretty treacherous. I am REALLY glad I bought extra groceries on Monday just in case~!
The just in Case happened.
We are LOVING IT! :)
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Question Regarding The Proverbs Verses
A very nice person visited my blog here, and posed a question, which I think is a very fair question.
They asked about what my thoughts were on the Proverbs Vrs... particularly
Proverbs 23: 13-14 and Proverbs 22:15.
I am going to attempt to answer this the best I can, with how I believe the Lord has brought us to understand these most controversial of verses. Please understand in my answering these directly, that I do not hold judgement or condemnation on those who think differently than I do, as I know very well the church in general and America in general holds to a very different view. I also know personally, many family and friends who do things different than we do.
I believe the Word of God to be inerrant in it's original form. I believe it is GOD breathed and is the word of GOD and take it very seriously. With all respect and honor, I will attempt to rightfully divide the truth as best I can. I am not a theologian, but a simple Berean. I do not believe God's word is so complicated that you must have a degree to understand it, but I do believe the Holy Spirit can lead us into all Truth. Life is a process. Spiritual life is a process too. :)
With that said:
There are many things in scripture that are not "Literal" but maybe more "General" observation. The book of Proverbs is full of observation, and thought, in a Poetic form, but that does not mean that we are supposed to take it Literally that it is something we should do. There are also scriptures that ARE literal, that we do not adhere to today. I will explain later.
A few examples might be:
Proverbs 19:23- The fear of the Lord leads to life, and whoever has it rests satisfied; he will not be visited by harm.
However, a dear friend of mine, who's father was probably one of the most godly men I ever knew, WAS visited by harm. He was murdered in his little business that he had owned for 30 years.
So, I guess I cannot take that one literally.
Proberbs 20:30- Blows that wound cleanse away evil; strokes make clean the innermost parts.
This particular scripture is not aimed at children but adults. Do you believe that if you sin, you should have blows to your body to cleanse away your evil? Do strokes to your body make your innermost parts clean?
Or do you go to your Heavenly Father and ask for his forgiveness and HE makes you clean?
Proverbs 25:15- With patience a ruler may be persuaded, and a soft tongue will break a bone.
Can a soft tongue really break a bone?
Those are just a FEW verses off the top of my head.
There is NO QUESTION that the verses in which you refer are speaking about discipline. The question is: What is discipline?
He who does not discipline his son, HATES his son. This is very true. But discipline does not mean punish, nor is it equal to punish.
Discipline comes from the word Disciple. To teach.
Proverbs 22:15-Folly is bound up in the heart of a child,
but the rod of discipline will drive it far away.
In this verse, it appears that DISCIPLINE IS the ROD, and the word ROD is being used metaphorically. So this verse could be read, Folly is bound up in the heart of a child but Godly instruction will drive it far away.
Proverbs 23:13-14- Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod he will not die. If you strike him with the rod you will save his soul from Sheol.
I do agree that we should NOT withhold discipline from our children. We should disciple them as is written in Numbers. When you wake up, when you walk, when you eat, when you lay down..... teach your children the ways of the Lord.
It does say, if you strike him he will not die. That is true, sometimes. Some kids die. But does it mean we are supposed to strike our kids? How many times? 1? 2? 3? 20?
The word child in this verse is very interesting. It is Naar. It means a young MAN between the ages of around 16-24.
Now, that puts a new spin on this verse. If you are talking about a foolish young person who is out of control, such as the young man in Singapore in the 1990's who destroyed a bunch of cars in a car lot, and got in trouble with the police. The actual punishment was 2 lashes. In his case, I could actually see a justice there. He wasn't 2. He was 17. But in our society, we consider a 17 year old untouchable! LOL Why? Because a group of Christians, who have PSYCHOLOGY degrees say that children learn everything by the time they are 5 and are set in their ways and if you don't punish them for every infraction possible, they will turn into hellions and go to hell...AND... It isn't true, nor is it biblical.
The truth is: YOU CANNOT SAVE YOUR CHILD. Nobody can come to the Father unless the Spirit Draws them. We come to faith by hearing the word of GOD and by trusting in the Death and Resurreciton of Jesus Christ. HE cleanses us from sin, not us.
Which brings up the verse Proverbs 22:6: "Train up a Child in the Way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it."
This scripture has been so misused over the years to put parents in bondage and fear.
It puts the salvation of the children ONTO the parent. The Jewish interpretation of this scripture is more like, "train them according to their bent", speaking of occupation and when they are older, they will have a job that they will keep.
It is GOD's Desire that none of us should perish. He leads us to repentence through HIS kindness.
Romans 2:4.
There are 2 verses in the Entire New Testament that speak to child raising.
1. Ephesians 6:4
2. Collosians 3:21
Both of these verses say the same thing:
Father's do not Frustrate your children, and the other Father's do not provoke your children to anger.
There is much in scripture to help us in raising our children to serve the Lord, but from the very best I can see, leading them by example, as Christ was an example to the Disciples and ultimately all of us, seems to be a clear way we are supposed to behave towards our children.
Christ did not berate the disciples or beat them. He instructed them.
One thing that is interesting to me in regards to the old testament scriptures regarding the raising of children is the verses within the law.
What about the verse for STONING children?
Deuteronomy 21:18-21
by the way, the same word for child is used.
There are many verses in scripture that speak of things we do not adhere to today, including slavery, beating a slave, cities of refuge for murderers, if a woman was raped she was required to marry her rapist and stay married to him her entire life......!
It is funny, I personally believe that the scripture in 1 Corinthians 11 regarding a woman covering her head in public worship is a command for today, so I cover my head..... but many I know do not. :)
There are plenty of scriptures that tell us to not be in debt. Yet, most people carry a home mortage, if not more, including car payments and credit card payments.
It is interesting to me that the Church seems to by hyperfocused on the "ROD" verses in Proverbs.
I believe that the ROD, can be used both as a real term for a rod, and metaphorically. It seems there are places where it is interchanged. The Rod of Correction may not necessarily be a rod but a word.
They Rod and Thy Staff they comfort me..... Rods and Staffs are used to PROTECT sheep. The Rod is actually used to beat of wolves and those who would HARM sheep.
I believe that Paul uses this term in 1 Corinthians 4:18-21 when he says, "Should I come to you with a Rod or with Love in a spirit of gentleness?"
Honestly, the things that bother me most, about the "spanking" issue, are not the person who sees their little one running in the parking lot and in a heat of panic gives them a swat on the tush..... in a rare moment of wanting to keep their child safe.
It is the books written that put parents in bondage. The "If you do this GOD's WAY, your kids will grow up to be angels, and be saved and if you don't do it exactly like we say, everybody is headed to hell in a handbasket and it will be ALL YOUR FAULT! What horrible burdens to put on parents.
There are books out there that give you information on what implement of destruction to use, how to use it, when to use it, if the child doesn't receive the punishment, do it again, and again, and again, and then you have cases as in the little girl from Liberia and her sister who were severely abused and one of them died!
The parents in this case were following teachings they believed to be "biblical".
I have to say, that when one of our sons was 3, the book, "The Strong Willed Child" came out.
I remember reading it and thinking, HOLY COW, if I were to follow this advice with my strong willed child, he'd die. I got rid of the book. I am so glad I did, and that the Lord gave me understanding of my son, not long after that, as I sought HIS wisdom and not the wisdom of a Christian Psychologist,
that my son needed my tender hearted guidance and not a fear based parenting style. He is serving the Lord today and is a huge delight to my heart.
Parenting is serious business and how we parent IS important! VERY important. But one of the scriptures that really sticks in my head the most is the warning in Matthew 18: 1-6.... That scripture to me is CLEAR! If I couple that with the other scriptures about not causing little ones to be exasperated or driven to wrath, I find myself looking to my Lord for honest and true direction for how to raise my children in a God honoring way and I am continually reminded of my own need for forgiveness for my own failures.
I do ask this for contemplation: Why do we hold our children to law, yet desire mercy from God for our own sin? Why do we not lead our children to a life of repentence through grace and mercy given to all who believe? Why do we think we should make our children pay for sin, yet we do things every single day, that were it not for the mercy of God in our lives, we would be condemned?
Micah 6:8- He has shown thee, Oh Man, what is good and what the Lord requires of you!
But to do justly, and to love mercy and to walk Humbly with your God.
Thanks for visiting my blog and asking! :)
They asked about what my thoughts were on the Proverbs Vrs... particularly
Proverbs 23: 13-14 and Proverbs 22:15.
I am going to attempt to answer this the best I can, with how I believe the Lord has brought us to understand these most controversial of verses. Please understand in my answering these directly, that I do not hold judgement or condemnation on those who think differently than I do, as I know very well the church in general and America in general holds to a very different view. I also know personally, many family and friends who do things different than we do.
I believe the Word of God to be inerrant in it's original form. I believe it is GOD breathed and is the word of GOD and take it very seriously. With all respect and honor, I will attempt to rightfully divide the truth as best I can. I am not a theologian, but a simple Berean. I do not believe God's word is so complicated that you must have a degree to understand it, but I do believe the Holy Spirit can lead us into all Truth. Life is a process. Spiritual life is a process too. :)
With that said:
There are many things in scripture that are not "Literal" but maybe more "General" observation. The book of Proverbs is full of observation, and thought, in a Poetic form, but that does not mean that we are supposed to take it Literally that it is something we should do. There are also scriptures that ARE literal, that we do not adhere to today. I will explain later.
A few examples might be:
Proverbs 19:23- The fear of the Lord leads to life, and whoever has it rests satisfied; he will not be visited by harm.
However, a dear friend of mine, who's father was probably one of the most godly men I ever knew, WAS visited by harm. He was murdered in his little business that he had owned for 30 years.
So, I guess I cannot take that one literally.
Proberbs 20:30- Blows that wound cleanse away evil; strokes make clean the innermost parts.
This particular scripture is not aimed at children but adults. Do you believe that if you sin, you should have blows to your body to cleanse away your evil? Do strokes to your body make your innermost parts clean?
Or do you go to your Heavenly Father and ask for his forgiveness and HE makes you clean?
Proverbs 25:15- With patience a ruler may be persuaded, and a soft tongue will break a bone.
Can a soft tongue really break a bone?
Those are just a FEW verses off the top of my head.
There is NO QUESTION that the verses in which you refer are speaking about discipline. The question is: What is discipline?
He who does not discipline his son, HATES his son. This is very true. But discipline does not mean punish, nor is it equal to punish.
Discipline comes from the word Disciple. To teach.
Proverbs 22:15-Folly is bound up in the heart of a child,
but the rod of discipline will drive it far away.
In this verse, it appears that DISCIPLINE IS the ROD, and the word ROD is being used metaphorically. So this verse could be read, Folly is bound up in the heart of a child but Godly instruction will drive it far away.
Proverbs 23:13-14- Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod he will not die. If you strike him with the rod you will save his soul from Sheol.
I do agree that we should NOT withhold discipline from our children. We should disciple them as is written in Numbers. When you wake up, when you walk, when you eat, when you lay down..... teach your children the ways of the Lord.
It does say, if you strike him he will not die. That is true, sometimes. Some kids die. But does it mean we are supposed to strike our kids? How many times? 1? 2? 3? 20?
The word child in this verse is very interesting. It is Naar. It means a young MAN between the ages of around 16-24.
Now, that puts a new spin on this verse. If you are talking about a foolish young person who is out of control, such as the young man in Singapore in the 1990's who destroyed a bunch of cars in a car lot, and got in trouble with the police. The actual punishment was 2 lashes. In his case, I could actually see a justice there. He wasn't 2. He was 17. But in our society, we consider a 17 year old untouchable! LOL Why? Because a group of Christians, who have PSYCHOLOGY degrees say that children learn everything by the time they are 5 and are set in their ways and if you don't punish them for every infraction possible, they will turn into hellions and go to hell...AND... It isn't true, nor is it biblical.
The truth is: YOU CANNOT SAVE YOUR CHILD. Nobody can come to the Father unless the Spirit Draws them. We come to faith by hearing the word of GOD and by trusting in the Death and Resurreciton of Jesus Christ. HE cleanses us from sin, not us.
Which brings up the verse Proverbs 22:6: "Train up a Child in the Way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it."
This scripture has been so misused over the years to put parents in bondage and fear.
It puts the salvation of the children ONTO the parent. The Jewish interpretation of this scripture is more like, "train them according to their bent", speaking of occupation and when they are older, they will have a job that they will keep.
It is GOD's Desire that none of us should perish. He leads us to repentence through HIS kindness.
Romans 2:4.
There are 2 verses in the Entire New Testament that speak to child raising.
1. Ephesians 6:4
2. Collosians 3:21
Both of these verses say the same thing:
Father's do not Frustrate your children, and the other Father's do not provoke your children to anger.
There is much in scripture to help us in raising our children to serve the Lord, but from the very best I can see, leading them by example, as Christ was an example to the Disciples and ultimately all of us, seems to be a clear way we are supposed to behave towards our children.
Christ did not berate the disciples or beat them. He instructed them.
One thing that is interesting to me in regards to the old testament scriptures regarding the raising of children is the verses within the law.
What about the verse for STONING children?
Deuteronomy 21:18-21
by the way, the same word for child is used.
There are many verses in scripture that speak of things we do not adhere to today, including slavery, beating a slave, cities of refuge for murderers, if a woman was raped she was required to marry her rapist and stay married to him her entire life......!
It is funny, I personally believe that the scripture in 1 Corinthians 11 regarding a woman covering her head in public worship is a command for today, so I cover my head..... but many I know do not. :)
There are plenty of scriptures that tell us to not be in debt. Yet, most people carry a home mortage, if not more, including car payments and credit card payments.
It is interesting to me that the Church seems to by hyperfocused on the "ROD" verses in Proverbs.
I believe that the ROD, can be used both as a real term for a rod, and metaphorically. It seems there are places where it is interchanged. The Rod of Correction may not necessarily be a rod but a word.
They Rod and Thy Staff they comfort me..... Rods and Staffs are used to PROTECT sheep. The Rod is actually used to beat of wolves and those who would HARM sheep.
I believe that Paul uses this term in 1 Corinthians 4:18-21 when he says, "Should I come to you with a Rod or with Love in a spirit of gentleness?"
Honestly, the things that bother me most, about the "spanking" issue, are not the person who sees their little one running in the parking lot and in a heat of panic gives them a swat on the tush..... in a rare moment of wanting to keep their child safe.
It is the books written that put parents in bondage. The "If you do this GOD's WAY, your kids will grow up to be angels, and be saved and if you don't do it exactly like we say, everybody is headed to hell in a handbasket and it will be ALL YOUR FAULT! What horrible burdens to put on parents.
There are books out there that give you information on what implement of destruction to use, how to use it, when to use it, if the child doesn't receive the punishment, do it again, and again, and again, and then you have cases as in the little girl from Liberia and her sister who were severely abused and one of them died!
The parents in this case were following teachings they believed to be "biblical".
I have to say, that when one of our sons was 3, the book, "The Strong Willed Child" came out.
I remember reading it and thinking, HOLY COW, if I were to follow this advice with my strong willed child, he'd die. I got rid of the book. I am so glad I did, and that the Lord gave me understanding of my son, not long after that, as I sought HIS wisdom and not the wisdom of a Christian Psychologist,
that my son needed my tender hearted guidance and not a fear based parenting style. He is serving the Lord today and is a huge delight to my heart.
Parenting is serious business and how we parent IS important! VERY important. But one of the scriptures that really sticks in my head the most is the warning in Matthew 18: 1-6.... That scripture to me is CLEAR! If I couple that with the other scriptures about not causing little ones to be exasperated or driven to wrath, I find myself looking to my Lord for honest and true direction for how to raise my children in a God honoring way and I am continually reminded of my own need for forgiveness for my own failures.
I do ask this for contemplation: Why do we hold our children to law, yet desire mercy from God for our own sin? Why do we not lead our children to a life of repentence through grace and mercy given to all who believe? Why do we think we should make our children pay for sin, yet we do things every single day, that were it not for the mercy of God in our lives, we would be condemned?
Micah 6:8- He has shown thee, Oh Man, what is good and what the Lord requires of you!
But to do justly, and to love mercy and to walk Humbly with your God.
Thanks for visiting my blog and asking! :)
Playing in the Ice
Here are Anna and Sarah playing in the ice and sleet! If the camera was shaking it is because it is COLD!!!!!!!! (about 25 degrees) It has been in the teens most of the day. And we are expecting more snow overnight.
Poor Erika cannot go out there in this stuff. She is resigned to observe. I told her a head injury or trip to the hospital is just not worth it. There is NO WAY she could balance on this stuff, and I cannot carry her. We'd both wind up in the hospital. :)
Poor Erika cannot go out there in this stuff. She is resigned to observe. I told her a head injury or trip to the hospital is just not worth it. There is NO WAY she could balance on this stuff, and I cannot carry her. We'd both wind up in the hospital. :)
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Happy Birthday To My Mike
I am married to an amazing man, who happens to be an amazing DAD!
Happy Birthday to My Mike! Our Daddy! My Love!
Happy Birthday to My Mike! Our Daddy! My Love!
A REAL conversation part 2
I wrote about our dilemma here.
And now, I want to write about what came from it.
Sarah said she actually really enjoys taking care of the chickens, but sometimes she get distracted with other things. She said she knows she needs to try harder to get her chicken work done before she does anything else.
So we have agreed that a.m. is best for getting coop work done, and then eggs need to be brought in 2 x's a day. Early and later when she puts the chickens away.
She also agreed that she had much room to improve in listening and responding.
We gave each other big hugs, and she is back to her normal self and I'm back to mine.
We both apologized.
I learned that I need to trust the Lord with every situation and not get to frustrated during the learning process. It takes a long time to teach children to do things in a manner that is beyond kid approved. :)
I also remembered that HOW I present something can make all the difference in its reception.
I know this to be true, and yet there are days when I become slothful in my parenting.
The funny thing is: Slothful leads to more work in the end because you have to correct things. :)
Respond don't react! RESPOND don't REACT!
A soft answer turns away wrath!
I was thinking about the hymn:
Softly and Tenderly
And now, I want to write about what came from it.
Sarah said she actually really enjoys taking care of the chickens, but sometimes she get distracted with other things. She said she knows she needs to try harder to get her chicken work done before she does anything else.
So we have agreed that a.m. is best for getting coop work done, and then eggs need to be brought in 2 x's a day. Early and later when she puts the chickens away.
She also agreed that she had much room to improve in listening and responding.
We gave each other big hugs, and she is back to her normal self and I'm back to mine.
We both apologized.
I learned that I need to trust the Lord with every situation and not get to frustrated during the learning process. It takes a long time to teach children to do things in a manner that is beyond kid approved. :)
I also remembered that HOW I present something can make all the difference in its reception.
I know this to be true, and yet there are days when I become slothful in my parenting.
The funny thing is: Slothful leads to more work in the end because you have to correct things. :)
Respond don't react! RESPOND don't REACT!
A soft answer turns away wrath!
I was thinking about the hymn:
Softly and Tenderly
Softly and tenderly Jesus is calling, calling for you and for me; see, on the portals he's waiting and watching, watching for you and for me. Refrain: Come home, come home; ye who are weary come home; earnestly, tenderly, Jesus is calling, calling, O sinner, come home! 2. Why should we tary when Jesus is pleading, pleading for you and for me? Why should we linger and heed not his mercies, mercies for you and for me? (Refrain) 3. Time is now fleeting, the moments are passing, passing from you and from me; shadows are gathering, deathbeds are coming, coming for you and for me. (Refrain) 4. O for the wonderful love he has promised, promised for you and for me! Though we have sinned, he has mercy and pardon, pardon for you and for me
I am mostly familiar with the first and fourth verses of this song.... but it gave me
time to think about How God Deals with His children, softly and tenderly,
with great mercy and pardon. Why should we be any different...?
A REAL Conversation
An alternative title could have been: Salvaging a BCLC moment. :) When a mom blows it!
As much of the nation is cold, so is Texas. In fact, it is about 18 degrees outside. Everything is frozen.
We knew it was coming, and I asked the girls to make sure the animal's bedding was changed, their sleeping areas clean, and to get prepared for a long week.
Anna takes care of the goats. Sarah takes care of the chickens.
We have had some difficulty with understanding the importance of doing things right and timely, AND how important it is for the chickens and eggs. I SHOULD have checked on Sarah's work as she is still not fully understanding her job .
Sarah doesn't care for taking care of the chickens, but it is her job right now. So, while the weather was in the 70's, I requested the above get done, so that all would be warm and secure.
Well, today, after she went out to fetch the eggs, several were FROZEN and cracked, meaning she didn't pick them up yesterday, and they had poop on them, meaning the bedding wasn't clean.
I had also told her this a.m. to be sure to open just the little door so the chickens could go in and out, but wouldn't get too cold.
SO.... I went out to investigate. I found that the coop had not been cleaned as requested. I found that the bedding was not fresh, just a little on the floor. I was not happy. I WAS NOT HAPPY!
And I was especailly NOT HAPPY that the chickens had been let out and both doors were closed so they couldn't get back in!
Now I was MAD!
So, I took care of the immediate problem so the chickens had enough warmth, and then worked my way back in the house . It is very icy outside and dangerous to walk around. I don't want her out there carrying arm loads of hay, so I did it.
When I came in I asked to talk with her. I let her know I was not pleased that she didn't do what she was supposed to, and said, there is no new hay in the coop, the eggs were not picked up, the chickens are locked out and the coop has not been cleaned! WHY?
Her instant reaction was anger. She tried to defend herself. "I DID put hay in the coop!" Then me:
"There is NO WAY you put hay in the coop!" and her countenance fell. I could see this was not going to be good, and honestly, I came in the house, freezing, glasses fogged up, covered in hay, and probably looked rather foreboding. :)
Actually, I look abit like a terrorist! LOL
So, what do I do? I say, "NO COMPUTER!" duh... like that had anything to do with anything.
I shot up a quick prayer and took a deep breath. And the scripture in Proverbs popped into my mind:
"A Soft Answer Turns Away Wrath".....
I had not been tender or soft in my delivery.
And then, I asked Sarah to write down what happened and how she saw things. The following is our correspondence, word for word. (we wrote notes to each other)
Sarah:
First, I don't like eggs! (this is what I really think)
And I think I should be able to write this. I don't think it is fair that you don't let me talk.
And I'm sure you don't care, like you said yesterday. Now yesterday I got hay! NOT a HANDFUL!
I didn't clean the poop because I didn't want to. I'm sorry, I'm not taking care of the chickens right.
Maybe someone else should do it.
Love,
Mad Sarah
P.S.- I really did put hay in there, but you won't believe me! PLUS: I opened the big door (I didn't put in in the hook because I was oing to open the small door and close the big door, BUT I FORGOT!) ugg!!!!!
P.S.S.- I'm glad I wrote this on paper, because I would have been to scared to say this.
Me:
I'm glad you wrote it too. :)
I don't want you to be scared, but I DO want you to be respectful. When you interrupt and huff and cross your arms, and act mad when I am speaking, that makes me feel MAD!
I am sorry I raised my voice at you, BUT....
I am not sorry to point out where correction is needed.
1. We need to pray for a heart change.
2. You need to take responsibility for what you have been given.
3. Eggs are a good thing. They are used in many things you like, including cheese cake and cookies!
4. Responsibility is not about liking or not liking eggs. I don't like laundry. :)
5. Can we talk now? :)
Sarah:
I'd like hot chocolate. (You don't have to get it)
I'm shakey, but not cold. Well, you were saying all these things that weren't true.
I'm sure you would get mad if a person was saying all these untrue things about you.
Can I pray in my heart? If I pray out loud, I don't think I'd really mean it. I would smile if we
talked right now and you'd probably give me a look.
P.S.- I DON'T WANT TO DO SCHOOL! WHAAAAA!!!!!!!!
Me:
I don't mind if you smile, You do that when you are upset, I know that.
What did I say that was untrue?
Sarah:
That I put a handful of hay in teh coop. I didn't. Then you said I didn't forget, I did!
P.S.- Thanks for the hot chocolate. What do you want to talk about?
Me:
What we are talking about now, and other stuff.
How much Hay did you put in?
Sarah:
Uhh Ohh! What other stuff? I put in an armful.
Me:
Your armful is my handful.
Responsibility nad being respectful to each other.
Sarah:
No, the chicken move it around with their feet to look for food and I'm sure the wind blows the hay too! Uh oh again!
Me:
Are you saying you don't want to talk to me? WAAAHHHH! :)
Sarah:
No, but maybe I don't want to talk about R and R.
Me:
She says disrespectfully.
Sarah:
LOL! :)
I appreciate Sarah's honesty. I appreciate when she gets calm, she can receive the instruction that she so needed today. I also appreciate that she let me see where I had done some things wrong too.
And then, we drank our hot cocoa and talked. Really talked. :)
And then we came up with a solution.
And yes, she is still responsible for chickens, and yes I apologized for not listening better and she apologized for not doing her job.
And yes, she cannot do computer until chores are done properly first.
And yes, I do have this look..... glasses down, over the nose..... all 7 of them are used to seeing "the look". :)
I love my Sarah..... we are both back to norm, and she has a new outlook on taking care of the chickens and being responsible. She understands that making excuses does not work..... if something isn't done, it isn't done, and if she needs help, she can ask.
I reinforced what I already in my heart know to be true. How I handle something can make things go very simply, or complicate them. Instead of dealing head on with the issue, in a tender and gentle way, I bulldozed through it.... that is never a good idea. I know I respond much better to loving instruction than accusation without complete fact. duh
Brought to you today by Mama and Sarah!
signing off! :)
We knew it was coming, and I asked the girls to make sure the animal's bedding was changed, their sleeping areas clean, and to get prepared for a long week.
Anna takes care of the goats. Sarah takes care of the chickens.
We have had some difficulty with understanding the importance of doing things right and timely, AND how important it is for the chickens and eggs. I SHOULD have checked on Sarah's work as she is still not fully understanding her job .
Sarah doesn't care for taking care of the chickens, but it is her job right now. So, while the weather was in the 70's, I requested the above get done, so that all would be warm and secure.
Well, today, after she went out to fetch the eggs, several were FROZEN and cracked, meaning she didn't pick them up yesterday, and they had poop on them, meaning the bedding wasn't clean.
I had also told her this a.m. to be sure to open just the little door so the chickens could go in and out, but wouldn't get too cold.
SO.... I went out to investigate. I found that the coop had not been cleaned as requested. I found that the bedding was not fresh, just a little on the floor. I was not happy. I WAS NOT HAPPY!
And I was especailly NOT HAPPY that the chickens had been let out and both doors were closed so they couldn't get back in!
Now I was MAD!
So, I took care of the immediate problem so the chickens had enough warmth, and then worked my way back in the house . It is very icy outside and dangerous to walk around. I don't want her out there carrying arm loads of hay, so I did it.
When I came in I asked to talk with her. I let her know I was not pleased that she didn't do what she was supposed to, and said, there is no new hay in the coop, the eggs were not picked up, the chickens are locked out and the coop has not been cleaned! WHY?
Her instant reaction was anger. She tried to defend herself. "I DID put hay in the coop!" Then me:
"There is NO WAY you put hay in the coop!" and her countenance fell. I could see this was not going to be good, and honestly, I came in the house, freezing, glasses fogged up, covered in hay, and probably looked rather foreboding. :)
So, what do I do? I say, "NO COMPUTER!" duh... like that had anything to do with anything.
I shot up a quick prayer and took a deep breath. And the scripture in Proverbs popped into my mind:
"A Soft Answer Turns Away Wrath".....
I had not been tender or soft in my delivery.
And then, I asked Sarah to write down what happened and how she saw things. The following is our correspondence, word for word. (we wrote notes to each other)
Sarah:
First, I don't like eggs! (this is what I really think)
And I think I should be able to write this. I don't think it is fair that you don't let me talk.
And I'm sure you don't care, like you said yesterday. Now yesterday I got hay! NOT a HANDFUL!
I didn't clean the poop because I didn't want to. I'm sorry, I'm not taking care of the chickens right.
Maybe someone else should do it.
Love,
Mad Sarah
P.S.- I really did put hay in there, but you won't believe me! PLUS: I opened the big door (I didn't put in in the hook because I was oing to open the small door and close the big door, BUT I FORGOT!) ugg!!!!!
P.S.S.- I'm glad I wrote this on paper, because I would have been to scared to say this.
Me:
I'm glad you wrote it too. :)
I don't want you to be scared, but I DO want you to be respectful. When you interrupt and huff and cross your arms, and act mad when I am speaking, that makes me feel MAD!
I am sorry I raised my voice at you, BUT....
I am not sorry to point out where correction is needed.
1. We need to pray for a heart change.
2. You need to take responsibility for what you have been given.
3. Eggs are a good thing. They are used in many things you like, including cheese cake and cookies!
4. Responsibility is not about liking or not liking eggs. I don't like laundry. :)
5. Can we talk now? :)
Sarah:
I'd like hot chocolate. (You don't have to get it)
I'm shakey, but not cold. Well, you were saying all these things that weren't true.
I'm sure you would get mad if a person was saying all these untrue things about you.
Can I pray in my heart? If I pray out loud, I don't think I'd really mean it. I would smile if we
talked right now and you'd probably give me a look.
P.S.- I DON'T WANT TO DO SCHOOL! WHAAAAA!!!!!!!!
Me:
I don't mind if you smile, You do that when you are upset, I know that.
What did I say that was untrue?
Sarah:
That I put a handful of hay in teh coop. I didn't. Then you said I didn't forget, I did!
P.S.- Thanks for the hot chocolate. What do you want to talk about?
Me:
What we are talking about now, and other stuff.
How much Hay did you put in?
Sarah:
Uhh Ohh! What other stuff? I put in an armful.
Me:
Your armful is my handful.
Responsibility nad being respectful to each other.
Sarah:
No, the chicken move it around with their feet to look for food and I'm sure the wind blows the hay too! Uh oh again!
Me:
Are you saying you don't want to talk to me? WAAAHHHH! :)
Sarah:
No, but maybe I don't want to talk about R and R.
Me:
She says disrespectfully.
Sarah:
LOL! :)
I appreciate Sarah's honesty. I appreciate when she gets calm, she can receive the instruction that she so needed today. I also appreciate that she let me see where I had done some things wrong too.
And then, we drank our hot cocoa and talked. Really talked. :)
And then we came up with a solution.
And yes, she is still responsible for chickens, and yes I apologized for not listening better and she apologized for not doing her job.
And yes, she cannot do computer until chores are done properly first.
And yes, I do have this look..... glasses down, over the nose..... all 7 of them are used to seeing "the look". :)
I love my Sarah..... we are both back to norm, and she has a new outlook on taking care of the chickens and being responsible. She understands that making excuses does not work..... if something isn't done, it isn't done, and if she needs help, she can ask.
I reinforced what I already in my heart know to be true. How I handle something can make things go very simply, or complicate them. Instead of dealing head on with the issue, in a tender and gentle way, I bulldozed through it.... that is never a good idea. I know I respond much better to loving instruction than accusation without complete fact. duh
Brought to you today by Mama and Sarah!
signing off! :)
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